Unconditional pet lovin'

There's something about the unconditional love that your pet can give you. They know you hurt and will love you whether you are healthy or sick, happy or sad, give them attention or not. Winston, our corgi, was by my side within seconds of me dislocating my kneecap in January. That was the most excruciating physical pain I have yet to endure. And Dickens, one of our three cats, always seems to show up just when you need someone warm by your side.
              Before the tears began silently sliding down my cheeks tonight, Winston took his post laying in my doorway, while Dickens jumped into my bed and practically fell asleep on top of me. The cause of my hurt doesn't need to be discussed, but that love my family's pets* show us is what does need to be discussed.
              They sense our pain and know that we need them even if we don't ask for it. That is what I call unconditional love. And that is the kind of love I look for, yearn for, think about, write about and pursue. Everything I write here, whether you agree with it or not, is me. I'm not hiding in my writing. I'm exposing myself. So when I say that I look for that unconditional love that my pets give my family and I, that is what I mean.

*We have five pets: Winston (a corgi), Tigger (an orange tabby cat), Dickens (a speckled white and grey cat), Belle (a white, not so friendly cat) and Andy (a beta fish named after my favorite Yankee Andy Pettitte)

Dear Anonymous

Last night, you made the comment on my apology post about how you think that I am getting guys to do what I want by writing about them in my blog, telling them about it, which then forces them to act differently. Because I don't know who you are, I can't completely speak to the circumstances that you know me through.
           If you refer back to an older post, you might find that I am not writing as a way of manipulating the guys I'm seeing. I am not doing this as a way to get a guy to act differently around me. More importantly, if he does choose to act differently around me, then that is his choice.
            I do not write here because I want guys to change to fit what I am looking for in a relationship, nor do I expect that to happen as a result of their reading this. I am just writing because I love to write, and it clears my mind.
            I thought your comment was endearing because it both caught me off guard and made me wonder who else thinks that I may be keeping a blog as a form of manipulation. The manipulation is not the case. And I hope that from now on, my blog posts won't be seen that way in your eyes, whoever you may be.

An apology

It never occurred to me to ask the guys that I'm writing about if it was okay to write about them. After telling my father that Bear preferred I didn't write about him, his response was "You shouldn't be writing about him, if you are seriously considering something with him."
            I guess he's right. From now on, I won't be blogging about Bear, and I'm sorry for not being honest and upfront with him about this. In the past, the guys I had been seeing found this on their own and all were flattered that they were being written about. But if you look back, I'm not with them now, am I?
            When Bear first confronted me about my blog, I was extremely angry that he didn't want me to write about him anymore. I felt like a piece of me was being stomped upon and that I was changing for him. In reality, that's not the case. I don't think that I have said anything truly demeaning about any of the guys on here, except maybe Mr. Pop, but in any case Bear makes a good point.
            What goes on between him and I should only be between him and I. So until I stop seeing Bear, he will no longer be a regularly featured guy here.