Today, Saucy and I had lunch together to catch up. Of course, conversation focused around boys, and she had me use nicknames instead of real names so she could keep track of who I was talking about.
We finally got to talking about one guy in particular, and the following occured:
Me: If things were different, we would definitely be together.
Saucy: So he would be your boyfriend?
Me, cringing: No, not my boyfriend. I would just be with him.
Saucy: Your boyfriend.
Me, still cringing: No, just together. No title. Not my boyfriend.
I don't really know why I am having such a hard time with the idea of committing to someone. I do not think I have issues with commitment considering I signed a job offer today. I am committing myself to work at a great company and that doesn't scare me. Yes, this Fool is employed before she graduates.
But what is it about committing to a guy that makes me cringe?
Thursday, April 29, 2010
Wednesday, April 28, 2010
Not-so-committed.
I can't commit right now. I'm shocking myself by saying this. Why? Because I'm a "relationship girl."
I'm the kind of girl that goes on dates. I'm the kind of girl who doesn't go around seeing multiple people at once. If I'm interested in someone, I won't see other people. And I want more than anything to fall in love again. That's part of the reason why I began Fool for Love.
Now, I'm sitting in the library, unable to sit still because the thought of being committed to someone right now terrifies me.
If THE were to change his mind all of a sudden and ask me to be his girlfriend, I would say no. It's not because I don't like him, nor because he isn't a good guy, but that kind of commitment scares me. Being exclusive with a person is one thing. That I could handle.
But being someone's girlfriend? No way. I never thought that I would come to a place in my life where I would not want a boyfriend. Who knew that this could happen?
For now, this Fool will stay in the not-so-committed zone.
I'm the kind of girl that goes on dates. I'm the kind of girl who doesn't go around seeing multiple people at once. If I'm interested in someone, I won't see other people. And I want more than anything to fall in love again. That's part of the reason why I began Fool for Love.
Now, I'm sitting in the library, unable to sit still because the thought of being committed to someone right now terrifies me.
If THE were to change his mind all of a sudden and ask me to be his girlfriend, I would say no. It's not because I don't like him, nor because he isn't a good guy, but that kind of commitment scares me. Being exclusive with a person is one thing. That I could handle.
But being someone's girlfriend? No way. I never thought that I would come to a place in my life where I would not want a boyfriend. Who knew that this could happen?
For now, this Fool will stay in the not-so-committed zone.
Tuesday, April 27, 2010
Dumplings on the couch
Despite the busy day I've had so far, I got a special treat in the middle: THE, Chinese food for lunch and cuddling on the couch. What more could an overwhelmed Fool ask for? More time.
I know that I've written this before, but it is just so easy with THE. I don't feel like I need to fill those random silences with conversation. But when we do talk, he actually listens. That comfort level can be hard to come by when you don't know someone very well, and yet, it works.
We laughed and cuddled on the couch, ate some delicious chicken with cashews and fried dumplings, then stalled for as long as possible before parting ways for class. It was a nice break in the day from all the end of year school work piled on our plates.
I'm going to miss college because of afternoon treats like this one. Soon, I'll be in the real world and won't be able to cuddle on the couch with a handsome boy and eat dumplings between classes.
I just wish I could have a little more time here at school. And definitely more time on the couch with THE. So for now, I appreciate the time that I do have left.
I know that I've written this before, but it is just so easy with THE. I don't feel like I need to fill those random silences with conversation. But when we do talk, he actually listens. That comfort level can be hard to come by when you don't know someone very well, and yet, it works.
We laughed and cuddled on the couch, ate some delicious chicken with cashews and fried dumplings, then stalled for as long as possible before parting ways for class. It was a nice break in the day from all the end of year school work piled on our plates.
I'm going to miss college because of afternoon treats like this one. Soon, I'll be in the real world and won't be able to cuddle on the couch with a handsome boy and eat dumplings between classes.
I just wish I could have a little more time here at school. And definitely more time on the couch with THE. So for now, I appreciate the time that I do have left.
An encounter with Monopoly Boy
Remember how I posted earlier today about how physical attraction can only play so much of a role in total attraction? Today, the perfect example presented himself to me in Grand Central Terminal: Monopoly Boy.
This name has been long standing in my family for him, so I find that it is only appropriate to continue its use.
On my way home from New York City, Monopoly Boy approached me, reached out to give me a hug and a kiss on the cheek. My first thought: why is he this terribly handsome? Then a flicker of hope filled my mind.
Maybe this encounter was a sign that we were supposed to try again. Maybe he had grown up from the immature, unsought advice giving boy. He invited me to join him while we waited for the same train back to Connecticut, and I accepted this invitation with a smile.
Smack! No, he didn't hit me. That was the sound of why he isn't right for me. He asked me about something that I had probably discussed with him too many times to count. Why is it that he can be this gorgeous, but never seem to remember a single thing I tell him about my life?
And why did he feel the need to advise me on my interview that I knew I was prepared for? And, more importantly, why did he dole out this advice without my even asking? Because he's Monopoly Boy.
Sometimes we meet guys who we think would be perfect, but in reality, they aren't. In the past, I may have ignored these irritating traits of his because he seems to be the whole package: handsome, smart, funny, and driven. But now, I appreciate my ability to know what I do and don't look for in an interest.
And I don't want someone who feigns interest in me, nor finds that he knows best in giving advice, all the time.
This name has been long standing in my family for him, so I find that it is only appropriate to continue its use.
On my way home from New York City, Monopoly Boy approached me, reached out to give me a hug and a kiss on the cheek. My first thought: why is he this terribly handsome? Then a flicker of hope filled my mind.
Maybe this encounter was a sign that we were supposed to try again. Maybe he had grown up from the immature, unsought advice giving boy. He invited me to join him while we waited for the same train back to Connecticut, and I accepted this invitation with a smile.
Smack! No, he didn't hit me. That was the sound of why he isn't right for me. He asked me about something that I had probably discussed with him too many times to count. Why is it that he can be this gorgeous, but never seem to remember a single thing I tell him about my life?
And why did he feel the need to advise me on my interview that I knew I was prepared for? And, more importantly, why did he dole out this advice without my even asking? Because he's Monopoly Boy.
Sometimes we meet guys who we think would be perfect, but in reality, they aren't. In the past, I may have ignored these irritating traits of his because he seems to be the whole package: handsome, smart, funny, and driven. But now, I appreciate my ability to know what I do and don't look for in an interest.
And I don't want someone who feigns interest in me, nor finds that he knows best in giving advice, all the time.
Monday, April 26, 2010
Physical attraction, you gotta love it
As much as you may want to, you can't deny physical attraction. You can't run from it, nor hide from it. And depending on how you think of it, physical attraction can be a great or terrible thing.
For me, physical attraction is an odd concept. I can be physically attracted to someone, but upon making out with him, or even speaking with him, that attraction can vanish.
Until this moment, I had not thought about the role personality plays in how much, or little, I am attracted to someone. I know that I need to be physically attracted to someone in order to be involved with him, but without a great personality, I would get bored.
Even now, I find that guys I used to think were handsome, or hot, are not anymore. And when I ask myself why, I realize it's because I find their personality not to be condusive with mine.
I won't say that I hate all my previous interests, or say that all their personalities are awful. But I will say that when it comes to spending time with someone, if he isn't witty, charming, humorous, intelligent or caring, I probably won't make an effort.
So if I pair those characteristics (and some more) with physical attraction, I may find someone who keeps my attention.
For me, physical attraction is an odd concept. I can be physically attracted to someone, but upon making out with him, or even speaking with him, that attraction can vanish.
Until this moment, I had not thought about the role personality plays in how much, or little, I am attracted to someone. I know that I need to be physically attracted to someone in order to be involved with him, but without a great personality, I would get bored.
Even now, I find that guys I used to think were handsome, or hot, are not anymore. And when I ask myself why, I realize it's because I find their personality not to be condusive with mine.
I won't say that I hate all my previous interests, or say that all their personalities are awful. But I will say that when it comes to spending time with someone, if he isn't witty, charming, humorous, intelligent or caring, I probably won't make an effort.
So if I pair those characteristics (and some more) with physical attraction, I may find someone who keeps my attention.
Sunday, April 25, 2010
Oh, just some roses
My most recent post was not completely random. Although, I do look back on my previous relations often, yesterday I was reminded of how wonderful it feels to receive flowers.
My friend, Best Date Ever, invited me to his fraternity's formal, which took place last night. Bestest and I finally were both invited, and since we are in different sororities, we jumped at the opportunity.
Upon getting to our friends' house, we each were given a bouquet of flowers. Bestest was given a bunch of white and pink roses, while I received three simple, but beautiful red roses. This gesture caught me off guard, and I was beyond flattered.
The night ended up being wonderful, and Best Date Ever actually won the award for the best formal date ever, in Fool's book. He was sweet, funny, attentive, thoughtful and a complete gentleman. Even though I don't have a romantic interest in him, I found it refreshing to just have a great night with a friend.
After the formal, we headed to Chuck's where we met up with Pitt and company. Later in the night, Pitt made the comment, "You're doing work in that dress." So, I responded, "Are you trying to tell me I look pretty?" We both smiled and ordered slices of crappy cheese pizza.
I had really hoped to see THE last night, but we are going to have lunch this week, and I am very excited about this! I would like to make some homemade mozzarella sticks for dinner with him too...hint, hint.
P.S. THE is flattered that I have written about him in my blog.
My friend, Best Date Ever, invited me to his fraternity's formal, which took place last night. Bestest and I finally were both invited, and since we are in different sororities, we jumped at the opportunity.
Upon getting to our friends' house, we each were given a bouquet of flowers. Bestest was given a bunch of white and pink roses, while I received three simple, but beautiful red roses. This gesture caught me off guard, and I was beyond flattered.
The night ended up being wonderful, and Best Date Ever actually won the award for the best formal date ever, in Fool's book. He was sweet, funny, attentive, thoughtful and a complete gentleman. Even though I don't have a romantic interest in him, I found it refreshing to just have a great night with a friend.
After the formal, we headed to Chuck's where we met up with Pitt and company. Later in the night, Pitt made the comment, "You're doing work in that dress." So, I responded, "Are you trying to tell me I look pretty?" We both smiled and ordered slices of crappy cheese pizza.
I had really hoped to see THE last night, but we are going to have lunch this week, and I am very excited about this! I would like to make some homemade mozzarella sticks for dinner with him too...hint, hint.
P.S. THE is flattered that I have written about him in my blog.
Girls don't like flowers; they remind them of bees.
Time for a trip down memory lane. I was a meek, insecure and lost Fool. It was first semester freshman year in college, and there was a tall, lanky but handsome boy who worked in the dining hall of my dorm.
I'm not sure where my slippers came from, but they were the most ridiculous blue, fuzzy slippers you may have ever seen. After almost half a semester of making flirty eye contact, D.H.B. (Dining Hall Boy) approached me and commented on my slippers. One of my favorite nicknames was born: Slippers.
One night, we were laying on his couch watching That 70's Show. The boys on the show were discussing what to get for a girl to try to impress her. Someone suggested flowers, and Ashton Kutcher's character said, "Girls don't like flowers; they remind them of bees." I then commented that girls do like flowers, and they don't remind us of bees.
The following night, D.H.B. invited me over. I walked to his bedroom and found a note hanging on his door with Slippers scribbled on the front. I opened it, and from what I can remember, it said: "I got you these because they don't remind girls of bees."
When I opened the door, waiting on his desk was a bouquet of wild flowers for me. D.H.B. was the first boy to ever buy me flowers. Even though, we were only together for less than a month, that memory will be forever imprinted in my mind.
Boys, men, or interests, buy a girl flowers! Even if she is allergic to them (I'm not though), flowers are a simple, but grand gesture to remind a girl that you are thinking of her.
I'm not sure where my slippers came from, but they were the most ridiculous blue, fuzzy slippers you may have ever seen. After almost half a semester of making flirty eye contact, D.H.B. (Dining Hall Boy) approached me and commented on my slippers. One of my favorite nicknames was born: Slippers.
One night, we were laying on his couch watching That 70's Show. The boys on the show were discussing what to get for a girl to try to impress her. Someone suggested flowers, and Ashton Kutcher's character said, "Girls don't like flowers; they remind them of bees." I then commented that girls do like flowers, and they don't remind us of bees.
The following night, D.H.B. invited me over. I walked to his bedroom and found a note hanging on his door with Slippers scribbled on the front. I opened it, and from what I can remember, it said: "I got you these because they don't remind girls of bees."
When I opened the door, waiting on his desk was a bouquet of wild flowers for me. D.H.B. was the first boy to ever buy me flowers. Even though, we were only together for less than a month, that memory will be forever imprinted in my mind.
Boys, men, or interests, buy a girl flowers! Even if she is allergic to them (I'm not though), flowers are a simple, but grand gesture to remind a girl that you are thinking of her.
Friday, April 23, 2010
THE read the blog...
Barely minutes after posting last night, I received a text from THE saying that he was actually at home thinking about life and that he wasn't lying.
I am highly amused by this. Last week, I brought up that I blog, but he never asked me what I wrote about, which I found to be a little odd. I didn't think much of it, but bringing up my daily Fool's life was my attempt at putting this out in the open from the start.
Pitt found it on his own, and I had originally tried to conceal it, with no success. So after receiving a text, I figured that the only reason he would text me again was because he had read. At this point, I felt satisfied.
I don't think that I could pinpoint my satisfaction, but I think that it was mostly because THE cared enough to text me and explain himself. Maybe I will give him the benefit of the doubt. We all have our moments in life where we need to just think and be alone.
And yet, I've learned from past experiences that if something feels off, it very well could be. I'm not willing to set myself up as a pretty little target. All I want is to have some fun, is that too much to ask?
Oh and THE, please refer back to my post on April 5. It will explain this all better.
I am highly amused by this. Last week, I brought up that I blog, but he never asked me what I wrote about, which I found to be a little odd. I didn't think much of it, but bringing up my daily Fool's life was my attempt at putting this out in the open from the start.
Pitt found it on his own, and I had originally tried to conceal it, with no success. So after receiving a text, I figured that the only reason he would text me again was because he had read. At this point, I felt satisfied.
I don't think that I could pinpoint my satisfaction, but I think that it was mostly because THE cared enough to text me and explain himself. Maybe I will give him the benefit of the doubt. We all have our moments in life where we need to just think and be alone.
And yet, I've learned from past experiences that if something feels off, it very well could be. I'm not willing to set myself up as a pretty little target. All I want is to have some fun, is that too much to ask?
Oh and THE, please refer back to my post on April 5. It will explain this all better.
Just gotta figure something out
I get these gut feelings, where I know something just seems off. Or maybe I have always gotten them but chosen to ignore them. Now, I am learning to read those signals, even though they suck.
After spending the night in the library, I had hoped to hang out with THE. That did not happen. So when I received a shady text message, I called Bestest. She proceeded to put me on speaker phone and allowed me to explain to Alto* the string of odd messages that THE and I exchanged.
"Do you want the honest truth?" Alto asked. I answered yes, and my gut feelings were confirmed. Apparently, THE is trying to juggle multiple girls. And his not-so-normal texts, which included that he had to figure something out and that he'd see me around soon, just confirmed my suspicions about this shady character.
Maybe I should create a chart displaying the length of time it takes for a guy to go from an interest to either a friend, an acquaintance, or not in my life at all.
*Alto -- In Italian it means tall; this will also serve as the name of a friend of mine who I met in Italian class last semester and happens to be tall creating a very fitting nickname.
After spending the night in the library, I had hoped to hang out with THE. That did not happen. So when I received a shady text message, I called Bestest. She proceeded to put me on speaker phone and allowed me to explain to Alto* the string of odd messages that THE and I exchanged.
"Do you want the honest truth?" Alto asked. I answered yes, and my gut feelings were confirmed. Apparently, THE is trying to juggle multiple girls. And his not-so-normal texts, which included that he had to figure something out and that he'd see me around soon, just confirmed my suspicions about this shady character.
Maybe I should create a chart displaying the length of time it takes for a guy to go from an interest to either a friend, an acquaintance, or not in my life at all.
*Alto -- In Italian it means tall; this will also serve as the name of a friend of mine who I met in Italian class last semester and happens to be tall creating a very fitting nickname.
Thursday, April 22, 2010
A little stubborn Fool
Last night, I angrily posted. This morning, I woke up, deleted the post and decided against posting when I'm extremely angry or upset because my filter and clear thought process seems to disappear.
I had been frustrated with THE because he wouldn't walk me home last night, but he texted me this afternoon making sure I had gotten home safely. A little late don't you think? He then said, "You little stubborn one. God damn, you're stubborn."
And I admit it; I am one stubborn Fool, but at least I know it. It turns out that my stubborn-ness irritated him a little bit last night, but that doesn't bother me. I'm a stubborn girl sometimes.
According to the Merriam-Webster Online Dictionary, stubborn means "unreasonably or perversely unyielding; justifiably unyielding; suggestive or typical of a strong stubborn nature." To be honest, I do not see anything wrong with this.
I like to think that being stubborn shows that I am my own person. Maybe it can be irritating at times, I certainly find others's stubborn-ness annoying, but it reflects a strong and secure personality. Would you prefer someone who always agreed and did exactly what you wanted all the time? I hope not...
I had been frustrated with THE because he wouldn't walk me home last night, but he texted me this afternoon making sure I had gotten home safely. A little late don't you think? He then said, "You little stubborn one. God damn, you're stubborn."
And I admit it; I am one stubborn Fool, but at least I know it. It turns out that my stubborn-ness irritated him a little bit last night, but that doesn't bother me. I'm a stubborn girl sometimes.
According to the Merriam-Webster Online Dictionary, stubborn means "unreasonably or perversely unyielding; justifiably unyielding; suggestive or typical of a strong stubborn nature." To be honest, I do not see anything wrong with this.
I like to think that being stubborn shows that I am my own person. Maybe it can be irritating at times, I certainly find others's stubborn-ness annoying, but it reflects a strong and secure personality. Would you prefer someone who always agreed and did exactly what you wanted all the time? I hope not...
Wednesday, April 21, 2010
A meal for one
You know what I miss about having a steady guy in my life?
Cooking for him. Yes, it's still just as nice to cook for a best guy or girl friend, but it's not quite the same.
I just finished a Fool's variation on baked ziti (see photo below), and I wish I had a guy to feed this to, but instead, I ate alone. I really enjoy cooking and baking, but it's the appreciation that someone you care about has for your time and effort that I crave.
Whether it's a friend, family member, or interest, my biggest way of showing my appreciation for another is through cooking a delicious meal, or throwing together a yummy dessert (usually cookies).
Is there anyone out there who wants to share a great meal with this simple Fool?
Cooking for him. Yes, it's still just as nice to cook for a best guy or girl friend, but it's not quite the same.
I just finished a Fool's variation on baked ziti (see photo below), and I wish I had a guy to feed this to, but instead, I ate alone. I really enjoy cooking and baking, but it's the appreciation that someone you care about has for your time and effort that I crave.
Whether it's a friend, family member, or interest, my biggest way of showing my appreciation for another is through cooking a delicious meal, or throwing together a yummy dessert (usually cookies).
Is there anyone out there who wants to share a great meal with this simple Fool?
Tuesday, April 20, 2010
What do I want?
I can sit here and preach that I don't want a relationship, but I wouldn't be honest if I kept saying that. Maybe you all figured this out, but after letting my mind wander in class, a light bulb went off in my head.
I do want a relationship, but not just any kind of relationship. I'm in the mode where I want to better understand who I am and discover who I want to be. My last serious relationship, which was 2 years ago, helped me realize a lot about myself. Do you want to know why?
He brought out the best in me. He helped me to see that I want to write great novels and children's books and believe in myself enough to do that. He helped me realize that I am comfortable in my body because we'd spend hours dancing and swimming in the pool during the summer, and not a single moment was preoccupied with how I looked in a bikini. And most importantly, he loved me for exactly who I was and didn't expect me to change for him.
I do want a relationship, but I want one with someone who can give me all of the above and more. What I want is to be with someone who helps me to grow and gives me the freedom to learn about who I am, all while we enjoy each other's company. Maybe this seems somewhat strange because we are at such a large transition in our lives (with graduation upon us), but I know that if I'm able to articulate what I want, then I'm taking the right step towards finding it.
I do want a relationship, but not just any kind of relationship. I'm in the mode where I want to better understand who I am and discover who I want to be. My last serious relationship, which was 2 years ago, helped me realize a lot about myself. Do you want to know why?
He brought out the best in me. He helped me to see that I want to write great novels and children's books and believe in myself enough to do that. He helped me realize that I am comfortable in my body because we'd spend hours dancing and swimming in the pool during the summer, and not a single moment was preoccupied with how I looked in a bikini. And most importantly, he loved me for exactly who I was and didn't expect me to change for him.
I do want a relationship, but I want one with someone who can give me all of the above and more. What I want is to be with someone who helps me to grow and gives me the freedom to learn about who I am, all while we enjoy each other's company. Maybe this seems somewhat strange because we are at such a large transition in our lives (with graduation upon us), but I know that if I'm able to articulate what I want, then I'm taking the right step towards finding it.
To take the chain from off the door
I'm good at the game, and I know it. I'm not trying to sound overly confident or egotistical, but I know what it takes to make a guy chase, or even better, what it takes to make a guy stay. Friends come to me for advice with guys: how to text, how to email, how to flirt, etc.
But as I was getting ready for bed tonight, I wondered, why? Why is it that I know how to play this game? I realized just as soon as my heart is hammered into the ground, I pick up as many pieces as I can hold in my hands, and I force them back together.
I do all of this -- the game playing, the fun, the flirting, the heartbreak, then repeat. I do it because I remember that happy and excited feeling of someone new. I do it because I have been in love and know what that feels like. Member explained it perfectly:
"Because I always told you, they etch themselves into your poetic memory. They carve out a place where you store your memories of them and the positive emotions you feel for them. Be grateful that you get to do that. You have the capacity to love and experience that. You're rich!"
It's true. I am rich with the ability to have loved and love again. So what does the game have to do with it? The game is the beginning and a test. The game plays the part of when you reel someone in and learn enough about that person to decide whether he's allowed in or not.
I don't like playing this game, but it's a protective mechanism. It's like a maze of steel chains that intertwine across the door to my heart. And I know that until he wins that game and proves himself, I won't take the chain from off the door.
But as I was getting ready for bed tonight, I wondered, why? Why is it that I know how to play this game? I realized just as soon as my heart is hammered into the ground, I pick up as many pieces as I can hold in my hands, and I force them back together.
I do all of this -- the game playing, the fun, the flirting, the heartbreak, then repeat. I do it because I remember that happy and excited feeling of someone new. I do it because I have been in love and know what that feels like. Member explained it perfectly:
"Because I always told you, they etch themselves into your poetic memory. They carve out a place where you store your memories of them and the positive emotions you feel for them. Be grateful that you get to do that. You have the capacity to love and experience that. You're rich!"
It's true. I am rich with the ability to have loved and love again. So what does the game have to do with it? The game is the beginning and a test. The game plays the part of when you reel someone in and learn enough about that person to decide whether he's allowed in or not.
I don't like playing this game, but it's a protective mechanism. It's like a maze of steel chains that intertwine across the door to my heart. And I know that until he wins that game and proves himself, I won't take the chain from off the door.
Monday, April 19, 2010
Floods of tears
The other night, one of my closest girl friends called me crying hysterically. When someone you consider a best friend, a sister, one of your family, or a part of you, is heart broken, you feel it too. How do you help stop that flood of tears?
You know you truly care about your friend when your heart instantly breaks too. But after those tears subside, how do you help your friend when you know that she's still broken inside? How do you help when that piece of crap guy broke her heart?
I don't have an answer to this one. Bestest helped me when things ended with Pitt, by laying in bed all day with me, rubbing my back. But when the person you love is miles away, how do you comfort her? As much as I wish I could teleport myself to wherever the stupid guy is to beat him up, I can't.
I would definitely beat him up if I could, but I'm a petite little lady, and I also am a firm believer that violence is not the answer. So phone calls, texts, emails and cards are all we have sometimes to try to help her pick up the pieces of her broken heart.
You know you truly care about your friend when your heart instantly breaks too. But after those tears subside, how do you help your friend when you know that she's still broken inside? How do you help when that piece of crap guy broke her heart?
I don't have an answer to this one. Bestest helped me when things ended with Pitt, by laying in bed all day with me, rubbing my back. But when the person you love is miles away, how do you comfort her? As much as I wish I could teleport myself to wherever the stupid guy is to beat him up, I can't.
I would definitely beat him up if I could, but I'm a petite little lady, and I also am a firm believer that violence is not the answer. So phone calls, texts, emails and cards are all we have sometimes to try to help her pick up the pieces of her broken heart.
Sunday, April 18, 2010
And then there is no mystery left...
For anyone who has watched Grey's, you know that the show's soundtrack is awesome. For me, music also inspires my thoughts, and since I have begun to spend so much time with THE, one lyric keeps blaring through the speakers of my mind. The song is "Portions for Foxes" by Rilo Kiley.
And the talkin' leads to touchin'
And the touchin' leads to sex
And then there is no mystery left
And it's bad news...
THE and I get along great, but for some reason while I'm with him, I keep thinking about this lyric.
We've spent quite a bit of time together since our date on Thursday, and technically we had a lunch date again today, which included sharing some delicious mozzarella sticks.
I just want to keep the mystery around for a little longer because I'm having fun with him, and I like being mysterious. And no offense to all you boys out there reading this, sometimes, when the mystery is gone, you leave too. So THE, you can't leave just yet.
And the talkin' leads to touchin'
And the touchin' leads to sex
And then there is no mystery left
And it's bad news...
THE and I get along great, but for some reason while I'm with him, I keep thinking about this lyric.
We've spent quite a bit of time together since our date on Thursday, and technically we had a lunch date again today, which included sharing some delicious mozzarella sticks.
I just want to keep the mystery around for a little longer because I'm having fun with him, and I like being mysterious. And no offense to all you boys out there reading this, sometimes, when the mystery is gone, you leave too. So THE, you can't leave just yet.
Saturday, April 17, 2010
Waffles, just one of the little things
A great thing about breakfast is that you can eat it anytime of the day. I always love making pancakes for dinner, and that seemed like a special treat growing up. Now, as an independent person, I can eat whatever I want whenever I want.
This afternoon, THE and I made waffles for breakfast. Delicious! I like that he can cook and enjoys food just as much as I do.
Sometimes I must stress how important the little things and little moments are in our lives. My favorite little moment from today was probably standing in THE's slightly dirty kitchen making waffles. I liked that he would turn and give me a kiss while we waited for the waffles to finish. And I liked that we could giggle and flirt with eachother as if we've known eachother for years.
So all I have to say is appreciate those waffles.
This afternoon, THE and I made waffles for breakfast. Delicious! I like that he can cook and enjoys food just as much as I do.
Sometimes I must stress how important the little things and little moments are in our lives. My favorite little moment from today was probably standing in THE's slightly dirty kitchen making waffles. I liked that he would turn and give me a kiss while we waited for the waffles to finish. And I liked that we could giggle and flirt with eachother as if we've known eachother for years.
So all I have to say is appreciate those waffles.
Friday, April 16, 2010
Let's just take this day by day.
Last night, THE came over. Instead of only a couple hours of talking (and some making out), the night turned into morning. When we finally looked at the time, it was 8AM. I probably couldn't even tell you the range of things we talked about, but we agreed it was a terrific night.
At one point in the night, he pokes me to say, "I'm not looking for a serious girlfriend." I was completely caught off guard by this.
Why is it that guys always throw this disclaimer in my face? Although the conversation progressed to his honesty and his past relationships, I wanted to say, chill out!
As it turns out, he wanted me to know this because I would be someone that he would consider dating. I appreciate this. We both seem to be on the same page though because we know our time left as undergraduates is waning. With only about a month left, I want to spend my time flirting and having fun.
If he wants to be a part of that, great, and if not, his loss. We both live near each other at home, but that doesn't even factor into any of this because we're here, at school, now. We enjoy each other's company, I just look forward to where today goes, and those ribs he's making this weekend. So how about taking this day by day?
At one point in the night, he pokes me to say, "I'm not looking for a serious girlfriend." I was completely caught off guard by this.
Why is it that guys always throw this disclaimer in my face? Although the conversation progressed to his honesty and his past relationships, I wanted to say, chill out!
As it turns out, he wanted me to know this because I would be someone that he would consider dating. I appreciate this. We both seem to be on the same page though because we know our time left as undergraduates is waning. With only about a month left, I want to spend my time flirting and having fun.
If he wants to be a part of that, great, and if not, his loss. We both live near each other at home, but that doesn't even factor into any of this because we're here, at school, now. We enjoy each other's company, I just look forward to where today goes, and those ribs he's making this weekend. So how about taking this day by day?
The underrated lunch date
Time for another Mr. Pumperknickle advice day. I had suggested getting a meal together to THE, and he suggested lunch, but I had no idea what to think because when a girl asks a guy to lunch, it's drawing the line at friends. But according to Mr. Pumperknickle, it could mean one of two things:
1. He hopes it goes well because then you have all afternoon, and maybe night, together; or
2. He has the opportunity to say he has afternoon plans so he can bail.
Well, THE and I went on a lunch date yesterday. Let me tell you that lunch dates are completely underrated. If a guy suggests one, and you're interested in him, go! I wish that I did not have afternoon classes because we could have sat outside talking for hours.
Maybe we have good chemistry, so that could have been what made the lunch great, but don't duck out, or write him off, if he does suggest lunch. Enjoy the meal, even if you choose a messy chicken caesar wrap to eat!
1. He hopes it goes well because then you have all afternoon, and maybe night, together; or
2. He has the opportunity to say he has afternoon plans so he can bail.
Well, THE and I went on a lunch date yesterday. Let me tell you that lunch dates are completely underrated. If a guy suggests one, and you're interested in him, go! I wish that I did not have afternoon classes because we could have sat outside talking for hours.
Maybe we have good chemistry, so that could have been what made the lunch great, but don't duck out, or write him off, if he does suggest lunch. Enjoy the meal, even if you choose a messy chicken caesar wrap to eat!
Thursday, April 15, 2010
It's just a little crush
News flash! Fool has a crush on THE. Last night, instead of completing my thesis, Bestest and I headed down to Flip night, which started out as an overly crowded scene, but eventually died down to the perfect amount of people.
THE and I made flirty eye contact from across the room, but didn't end up talking for a good half hour. I guess that he may be just as stubborn as I am because I refused to go to him. When we finally got to chatting, I realized that he's actually kind of cool.
He has that witty and dry sarcasim like mine, which always intrigues me. I always try to find, in both friends and interests, someone who can keep up with my wit. Gold star for THE!
On a side note, I sent a message to Mr. Pop with a link to yesterday's blogpost. We ran into eachother at Chuck's* and started chatting. We smiled across the bar while I chatted with one of his roommates, and then he and I finally got to talking. He found my post interesting, which I'm not surprised about.
But as we parted ways for the night, it felt as though all my anger and hurt from him had disappeared. We agreed on being friends, and now I'm a very happy Fool.
*Chuck's Cafe -- a favorite bar and eatery of Syracuse University students. Not only do they offer inexpensive beer, but also some amazing wings or delicious tomato feta pizzas!
THE and I made flirty eye contact from across the room, but didn't end up talking for a good half hour. I guess that he may be just as stubborn as I am because I refused to go to him. When we finally got to chatting, I realized that he's actually kind of cool.
He has that witty and dry sarcasim like mine, which always intrigues me. I always try to find, in both friends and interests, someone who can keep up with my wit. Gold star for THE!
On a side note, I sent a message to Mr. Pop with a link to yesterday's blogpost. We ran into eachother at Chuck's* and started chatting. We smiled across the bar while I chatted with one of his roommates, and then he and I finally got to talking. He found my post interesting, which I'm not surprised about.
But as we parted ways for the night, it felt as though all my anger and hurt from him had disappeared. We agreed on being friends, and now I'm a very happy Fool.
*Chuck's Cafe -- a favorite bar and eatery of Syracuse University students. Not only do they offer inexpensive beer, but also some amazing wings or delicious tomato feta pizzas!
Wednesday, April 14, 2010
A "Fun" memory
Mr. Pop and I danced around his bedroom just the two of us. He'd twirl me around, and we both would sing the chorus to "All the pretty girls" by Fun. We were a little off key and sang way too loudly, but looking into his eyes and feeling that genuine happiness makes up for the pain I felt when we ended.
Those are the moments I hold onto. Mr. Pop and I may no longer speak, hang out or even see each other on our way to class, but for the time that we spent together, we did have lots of fun. Sometimes I wish that we could have still talked every once in a while, but at least we were able to enjoy ourselves during the time that we had.
Those are the moments I hold onto. Mr. Pop and I may no longer speak, hang out or even see each other on our way to class, but for the time that we spent together, we did have lots of fun. Sometimes I wish that we could have still talked every once in a while, but at least we were able to enjoy ourselves during the time that we had.
Tuesday, April 13, 2010
Living in a dream world
On Sunday, I felt crummy about not having a boy to be excited about. Today, I barely made it to 9AM, and I successfully picked a fight with Bear. Then Member's words pop back into my head: don't feel bad about doing you. It was a stupid fight, not even a real one actually, but kind of a big part of me. Some people may call it naive, but I think that I constantly strive to be the happiest possible.
The box of my most recent perfume purchase has the following poem:
She lives in a dream more dazzling than fiction
Imaginary, yet real, she defies all prediction
An incredible girl, Sofia draws you right right in
To where the everyday ends "and magic begins..."
And this is how I aspire to live, although some may call me quite predictable. Back to the fight: I choose not to read the news all the time because I find a lot of the news to be depressing. (But I will admit to having the AP Application on my Blackberry.)
It may make me ignorant, or uninformed, however why should I subject myself to something that I know may make me unhappy? And thus, I come back to why do I keep hanging out with certain guys who I wish I was with, but can't be... In the end, these young men make me happy.
Maybe you don't agree with my dream world, I just hope you choose to dazzle in it with me.
The box of my most recent perfume purchase has the following poem:
She lives in a dream more dazzling than fiction
Imaginary, yet real, she defies all prediction
An incredible girl, Sofia draws you right right in
To where the everyday ends "and magic begins..."
And this is how I aspire to live, although some may call me quite predictable. Back to the fight: I choose not to read the news all the time because I find a lot of the news to be depressing. (But I will admit to having the AP Application on my Blackberry.)
It may make me ignorant, or uninformed, however why should I subject myself to something that I know may make me unhappy? And thus, I come back to why do I keep hanging out with certain guys who I wish I was with, but can't be... In the end, these young men make me happy.
Maybe you don't agree with my dream world, I just hope you choose to dazzle in it with me.
Sunday, April 11, 2010
Is this a bad thing?
I'm so content in all other aspects of my life, but that giddy "I'm in like" feeling seems to be a very prominent hole. Is it so bad that I want someone to be excited about?
I feel terrible and almost guilty. I'm sitting at my desk, while Muffy, one of the most important people in my life, lounges on my floor. We don't get to spend time with each other very often because of the distance, but we've maintained this long-distance relationship for an eight of 12-year period.
Again, another topic that I go back and forth on. (Sorry for this Pitt.) I say that I'm not an advocate of long-distance relationships, but if someone means enough to you, and you really love them, then the distance should not matter.
Why do I want that happy-go-lucky feeling when I have my Muffy here with me? Maybe it's because she's going home to her beau, and Bestest gets to see her interest late tonight, and I'm just here.
I feel terrible and almost guilty. I'm sitting at my desk, while Muffy, one of the most important people in my life, lounges on my floor. We don't get to spend time with each other very often because of the distance, but we've maintained this long-distance relationship for an eight of 12-year period.
Again, another topic that I go back and forth on. (Sorry for this Pitt.) I say that I'm not an advocate of long-distance relationships, but if someone means enough to you, and you really love them, then the distance should not matter.
Why do I want that happy-go-lucky feeling when I have my Muffy here with me? Maybe it's because she's going home to her beau, and Bestest gets to see her interest late tonight, and I'm just here.
Saturday, April 10, 2010
My formal date's a girl!
Tonight is formal! Yes, I'm in a sorority, so we have the most fabulous of parties with dancing, drinks, and more. In the past, formal has been an array of experiences... One year I asked 5 guys before finding a date. I think that says a lot about my determination.
Anyways, Muffy is my date! I'm very excited about this because last semester I brought my best guy friend Regis, and it was probably the best formal that I've been to, minus me having some booze tears. So I'm very much looking forward to tonight!
I heard from THE last night, and we chatted a little bit via text which made me so happy. I've been spending a lot of time witih Pitt, which is great, but I still wish we could be more than friends. And apparently now all of the boys want me to give them nicknames...so we'll work on that.
Bestest we'll miss you tonight!
Anyways, Muffy is my date! I'm very excited about this because last semester I brought my best guy friend Regis, and it was probably the best formal that I've been to, minus me having some booze tears. So I'm very much looking forward to tonight!
I heard from THE last night, and we chatted a little bit via text which made me so happy. I've been spending a lot of time witih Pitt, which is great, but I still wish we could be more than friends. And apparently now all of the boys want me to give them nicknames...so we'll work on that.
Bestest we'll miss you tonight!
Friday, April 9, 2010
Post-Birthday Exhaustion.
Sorry for not posting yesterday, but I'm back! My birthday was stellar-tastic. I have the most wonderful group of best friends, and Muffy flew up for the weekend to celebrate! And apparently, this blog creates some good conversation, and now friends are asking who different people are that I talk about.
THE is kind of a player, or that's what I have take away from him so far. He's extremely attractive and funny, but he does not seem actually interested, nor does he give me the attention that I desire.
Cover asked for my number finally! Backstory: Cover will be his nickname due to the fact that we met because I paid for his cover at Flip Night months ago, even though I had never spoken to him before. Yes, it has been months, but that's because we have barely run into eachother when we've been out. Last night, I saw him in my party girl state, and we flirted and he took my number.
I hope to hear from him, but this weekend I am just enjoying the company of my most fabulous best Muffy. We've been best friends for 12 years! Crazy, but best friend love is what's making most of my world go 'round.
THE is kind of a player, or that's what I have take away from him so far. He's extremely attractive and funny, but he does not seem actually interested, nor does he give me the attention that I desire.
Cover asked for my number finally! Backstory: Cover will be his nickname due to the fact that we met because I paid for his cover at Flip Night months ago, even though I had never spoken to him before. Yes, it has been months, but that's because we have barely run into eachother when we've been out. Last night, I saw him in my party girl state, and we flirted and he took my number.
I hope to hear from him, but this weekend I am just enjoying the company of my most fabulous best Muffy. We've been best friends for 12 years! Crazy, but best friend love is what's making most of my world go 'round.
Wednesday, April 7, 2010
Flip-flopping!
That's what I have been doing for the past too many hours. I'm sitting in a computer lab in Newhouse, and instead of working on my thesis, I'm chatting up Bestest, counting down the hours until my birthday, and debating about writing about my new crush... except he's not exactly new.
We met through Pitt, when Pitt and I first began whatever we were, but because my focus was on Pitt, I ignored my attraction to THE. So now that I'm no longer involved with Pitt, and I'm actually only being Pitt's friend (I know I keep emphasizing this, but I find this is a very big deal!), I can focus my attentions elsewhere.
THE was at Flip Night* last week, and we flirted and somehow I added myself to be his Facebook friend on his phone. I'm still wondering as to why I was adding myself on Facebook instead of adding my phone number, but we'll ignore that for now.
What it all comes down to is that he won't be able to celebrate my actual birthday with me, but he will be at Flip Night tonight to begin a weekend of celebrations (yes, it's Wednesday). And as much as I'm disappointed about him not coming to my fabulous birthday bash, Muffy will be here, so no complaints on Fool's end.
Check back tomorrow to find out if Fool had her fun! And I'll let you know what happens with THE...
*Flip Night - Hosted by Faegan's (a local restaurant/bar); every Wednesday night, after ordering a beer, the bartender flips a quarter, if you guess correctly then the beer is FREE!
We met through Pitt, when Pitt and I first began whatever we were, but because my focus was on Pitt, I ignored my attraction to THE. So now that I'm no longer involved with Pitt, and I'm actually only being Pitt's friend (I know I keep emphasizing this, but I find this is a very big deal!), I can focus my attentions elsewhere.
THE was at Flip Night* last week, and we flirted and somehow I added myself to be his Facebook friend on his phone. I'm still wondering as to why I was adding myself on Facebook instead of adding my phone number, but we'll ignore that for now.
What it all comes down to is that he won't be able to celebrate my actual birthday with me, but he will be at Flip Night tonight to begin a weekend of celebrations (yes, it's Wednesday). And as much as I'm disappointed about him not coming to my fabulous birthday bash, Muffy will be here, so no complaints on Fool's end.
Check back tomorrow to find out if Fool had her fun! And I'll let you know what happens with THE...
*Flip Night - Hosted by Faegan's (a local restaurant/bar); every Wednesday night, after ordering a beer, the bartender flips a quarter, if you guess correctly then the beer is FREE!
Tuesday, April 6, 2010
Another Member moment.
Yesterday, I decided to put up a disclaimer. I was extremely anxious at that point because I hadn't heard from Bear, and I knew that Pitt had based part of his decision off of my blog. Instead of just accepting life for what it is, I BBMed Member, who gave me some more words of wisdom:
"Bump the people that make you feel bad for doing you."
We then proceeded to discuss how all I'm doing is simply being honest about who I am. I pride myself on basing relationships on honesty, even if it brings me to the point of not getting what I want. Why is it that such a simple statement about being myself can be so powerful?
I think that it's these concise ways of saying something that can move me back to the stable ground and focus on how I'm just being true to myself. Thank you Member!
P.S. Two more days til the big 22! Who's ready to celebrate?
"Bump the people that make you feel bad for doing you."
We then proceeded to discuss how all I'm doing is simply being honest about who I am. I pride myself on basing relationships on honesty, even if it brings me to the point of not getting what I want. Why is it that such a simple statement about being myself can be so powerful?
I think that it's these concise ways of saying something that can move me back to the stable ground and focus on how I'm just being true to myself. Thank you Member!
P.S. Two more days til the big 22! Who's ready to celebrate?
Monday, April 5, 2010
Disclaimer Day!
Dear boys, men, guys, interests, former interests, current interests, and future interests,
I think it's time that I put up a disclaimer. And what better of a day than a Monday after barely 4 hours of sleep?
Here's the deal, for all of you reading this, and completely confused by me, or thinking that I assume guys just play games, or that I'm personally attacking you, or making you look bad, or who knows what you think, that is not the case.
I've chosen to only use nicknames to keep identities safe, and only the closest people in my life know who is who, so for everyone out there who has figured out a person, or knows the person, that's okay too.
Also, this blog is a public journal. It is a place for me to write because it's something I love to do, and specifically write about a topic that plays a main role in my life. I don't want any of you to think that I'm trying to make you look like the Big Bad Wolf, or that I don't want to be involved with you because of what I write here. The conflict of me going back and forth is just how I work out my problems, the World Wide Web just allows an outlet for me. I just hope that you understand that this is how my mind works, and I just happen to document my mind in the form of a blog.
Basically, just because I'm upset, disappointed, lost, confused, hurt, angry, or even happy, I hope that it doesn't influence a decision in keeping me, or not keeping me, in your life.
Please take this blog for what it is: a diary. I understand if my thoughts influence you that much to steer clear of me, or to make you less interested in talking to me, however, I hope that you think of this as something to enjoy, and appreciate that you do get an inside look into the mind of a woman.
That is all,
Fool for Love
I think it's time that I put up a disclaimer. And what better of a day than a Monday after barely 4 hours of sleep?
Here's the deal, for all of you reading this, and completely confused by me, or thinking that I assume guys just play games, or that I'm personally attacking you, or making you look bad, or who knows what you think, that is not the case.
I've chosen to only use nicknames to keep identities safe, and only the closest people in my life know who is who, so for everyone out there who has figured out a person, or knows the person, that's okay too.
Also, this blog is a public journal. It is a place for me to write because it's something I love to do, and specifically write about a topic that plays a main role in my life. I don't want any of you to think that I'm trying to make you look like the Big Bad Wolf, or that I don't want to be involved with you because of what I write here. The conflict of me going back and forth is just how I work out my problems, the World Wide Web just allows an outlet for me. I just hope that you understand that this is how my mind works, and I just happen to document my mind in the form of a blog.
Basically, just because I'm upset, disappointed, lost, confused, hurt, angry, or even happy, I hope that it doesn't influence a decision in keeping me, or not keeping me, in your life.
Please take this blog for what it is: a diary. I understand if my thoughts influence you that much to steer clear of me, or to make you less interested in talking to me, however, I hope that you think of this as something to enjoy, and appreciate that you do get an inside look into the mind of a woman.
That is all,
Fool for Love
Sunday, April 4, 2010
Hippity hop, he's not on his way.
Well Easter is mostly over, and I’m writing on my way home from a giant Italian feast, and some birthday cake (my birthday is Thursday). And I find that I’m lost.
I’m about to embark on a 4-hour car ride with Pitt back to school. I’m excited, and anxious all at once. I like him, but I’m being a grown up, remember? No making out, Fool!
Now there's Bear. Bear knows exactly who he is because I used to call him this while we were BBMing every day for a good three months. He took me out on a date during our winter break, and let me tell you, it was the best ever! How many dates have you gone on that last more than 3 hours?!
Well, Bear has come back into my life, kind of. We had hoped to see each other this weekend while we were both home from school, but I guess it’s not happening. Last night he had made it clear that he would find an hour for me today to talk, and now I’m filled with disappointment. I don’t really understand why I’m disappointed though.
When things seemed to be getting serious in February, he had made it crystal clear that he did not want to be with me. So then last night when he said he wanted to talk to me in person to clear things up, I was still left wondering what needed to be cleared up. What more needs to be said than I didn’t want to be with you? But I got excited to see him, and to talk and to laugh. (He made me laugh a lot; I miss that.)
But now, I’m sitting here thinking, well what do you expect? Someone who has let you down before will do it again. Fool, you know better.
I’m about to embark on a 4-hour car ride with Pitt back to school. I’m excited, and anxious all at once. I like him, but I’m being a grown up, remember? No making out, Fool!
Now there's Bear. Bear knows exactly who he is because I used to call him this while we were BBMing every day for a good three months. He took me out on a date during our winter break, and let me tell you, it was the best ever! How many dates have you gone on that last more than 3 hours?!
Well, Bear has come back into my life, kind of. We had hoped to see each other this weekend while we were both home from school, but I guess it’s not happening. Last night he had made it clear that he would find an hour for me today to talk, and now I’m filled with disappointment. I don’t really understand why I’m disappointed though.
When things seemed to be getting serious in February, he had made it crystal clear that he did not want to be with me. So then last night when he said he wanted to talk to me in person to clear things up, I was still left wondering what needed to be cleared up. What more needs to be said than I didn’t want to be with you? But I got excited to see him, and to talk and to laugh. (He made me laugh a lot; I miss that.)
But now, I’m sitting here thinking, well what do you expect? Someone who has let you down before will do it again. Fool, you know better.
Saturday, April 3, 2010
Like falling into spring.
"To fall in love is awfully simple, but to fall out of love is simply awful." -Bess Myerson
Two different kinds of falling in love happen. Falling in love with someone, and falling in love with a person, who is not falling in love with you. And the difference is pretty damn simple. You feel like you're flying on top of the world, holding your lover's hand, and just can't get enough of that new, exciting emotion of invincibility.
And then there's the other kind. That wonderful feeling of love, and wanting and needing someone else, but they don't feel the same way back. Now that I write this, I wonder if you could even call it falling in love since love is a mutual experience.
I'm home in Connecticut for the weekend to celebrate Easter. The weather is perfect: low 70s, sunshine galore, and the fresch scent of hyacinths (my all-time favorite flower!). What this time of year really reminds me of though, is love.
About 2 years ago now, I was falling in love for the first time, but this year, instead of being the emotional trainwreck and a completely broken Fool, I am optomistic. Even though I am realizing that I don't want a serious relationship right now, I do want to fall in love again, at some point. And for that optomism, I am grateful.
Two different kinds of falling in love happen. Falling in love with someone, and falling in love with a person, who is not falling in love with you. And the difference is pretty damn simple. You feel like you're flying on top of the world, holding your lover's hand, and just can't get enough of that new, exciting emotion of invincibility.
And then there's the other kind. That wonderful feeling of love, and wanting and needing someone else, but they don't feel the same way back. Now that I write this, I wonder if you could even call it falling in love since love is a mutual experience.
I'm home in Connecticut for the weekend to celebrate Easter. The weather is perfect: low 70s, sunshine galore, and the fresch scent of hyacinths (my all-time favorite flower!). What this time of year really reminds me of though, is love.
About 2 years ago now, I was falling in love for the first time, but this year, instead of being the emotional trainwreck and a completely broken Fool, I am optomistic. Even though I am realizing that I don't want a serious relationship right now, I do want to fall in love again, at some point. And for that optomism, I am grateful.
Friday, April 2, 2010
Welcome Mr. Pumperknickle!
Yesterday, Bestest and I were on our way to Faegan's for lunch, when we ran into a Mr. Pumperknickle. He decided to join us, and thus girl talk commenced. How refreshing to have a male perspective at the table as we dished about our guy interests, and former interests. Then a thought popped into my head, what about a featured advice person, specifically a male?
I asked him, and he said yes. We came up with the name Mr. Pumperknickle because he loves pumperknickle bread! So here's his first words of wisdom:
"If a guy can't be straight up about how he feels about you, it's not worth it. If he is playin' games, like feigning interest in your friend, he's an idiot. Flirting is fun, but there's a time to be honest. That's the deal breaker." -Mr. Pumperknickle
I asked him, and he said yes. We came up with the name Mr. Pumperknickle because he loves pumperknickle bread! So here's his first words of wisdom:
"If a guy can't be straight up about how he feels about you, it's not worth it. If he is playin' games, like feigning interest in your friend, he's an idiot. Flirting is fun, but there's a time to be honest. That's the deal breaker." -Mr. Pumperknickle
Thursday, April 1, 2010
Perspective.
Sometimes, humans have moments, where we become so self-consumed that we forget about the big picture. Yesterday, Bestest and I were walking back to my apartment, and I overheard a girl ranting about a guy that she had been seeing.
Why is it that our lives, as women, have become so consumed by men? But the thing is, it's not men. It's love. Love comes in all shapes and forms. Love from your parents. Love from your family. Love from your sister, or brother. Love from your friends. Love from your pets, like my Winston or Tigger!
But it's that genuine love that we forget, and that love that we crave, all at once. I won't tell my story about my first true love with a guy. A fairy tale romance to be exact. (You can read it in Chicken Soup for the Soul: Campus Chronicles, the story is "Puzzle Pieces.") I will tell you that love doesn't have to be that all-consuming emotion that I quoted Member saying yesterday about how when you wake up in the morning and are so sure.
Love is its own entity, where, no matter what, you can turn to it, and say "I need you right now." And when you need that love the most, it will come to you. Through your Mom, your Dad, your sister, your best friend, your interest, or even your dog. Because if that love is true love, it will give you a hug even if you're a million miles away.
Why is it that our lives, as women, have become so consumed by men? But the thing is, it's not men. It's love. Love comes in all shapes and forms. Love from your parents. Love from your family. Love from your sister, or brother. Love from your friends. Love from your pets, like my Winston or Tigger!
But it's that genuine love that we forget, and that love that we crave, all at once. I won't tell my story about my first true love with a guy. A fairy tale romance to be exact. (You can read it in Chicken Soup for the Soul: Campus Chronicles, the story is "Puzzle Pieces.") I will tell you that love doesn't have to be that all-consuming emotion that I quoted Member saying yesterday about how when you wake up in the morning and are so sure.
Love is its own entity, where, no matter what, you can turn to it, and say "I need you right now." And when you need that love the most, it will come to you. Through your Mom, your Dad, your sister, your best friend, your interest, or even your dog. Because if that love is true love, it will give you a hug even if you're a million miles away.
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