Double wammy.

"I'm going to get really, really hurt, and I don't want to do that." I said that while yelling into the phone to my best friend because I'm angry, and I don't do angry. I never thought that those would be words coming out of my mouth, but they did, and they scare me. She suggested just having fun for the next few months. You know, keeping things light? I just don't know how to do that.
     I don't want to be the girl that walks away because she doesn't want to get hurt because that would make me just like all the other guys that did it to me, but I see only black and white here. Run away, you fool (that's me!).
     Even if ground rules were to be set, and I have no idea what those would consist of, I still see myself getting trampled on, or him, again. And I don't like trampling. Maybe I should just give up on guys, or falling in love. That makes me cringe, but I guess it's an option, and it's always good to weigh all your options, right? I should have given up guys for lent instead of candy.
    Help me. For now, I'm just a very confused fool.

P.S. Pitt found my blog.